It’s going to be a miracle if this kid survives the next 10 days

Last night as dinner was cooking (lasagna out of a box, ahem.), I was doing the dishes, Adrianna was nomming my leg, Greg was attempting to tidy up the living room and Brock was playing in the toy room.  All of a sudden, Brock rushes into the kitchen an breathlessly announces that he has to poop.

He does that a lot.

Breathless announcements, I mean.

Well honestly?  He poops a lot, too.

But that’s another story for another post.

I compassionately told him, “Well why are you telling me?!  Run to the bathroom!”

He darts off to the bathroom.

I continue unloading the dishwasher.

Adrianna continues to whine at me and shout, “up!  Up!  UP!”

Brock comes running back into the kitchen, naked from the waist down, holding his jeans.  He has a huge grin on his face.

“Brock David!  Put on your underwear!  Dinner will be ready soon!”

“Mom!  I don’t have any underwear!”

“Well that’s because you left them in the bathroom.  Now hurry up & get them so you can get dressed!”

“Mooooooommm!  I said I don’t have any underwear!  I fwushed dem down the toiwet!”

Greg and I both bolt into the bathroom and search everywhere for the underwear.

Brock quickly follows us into the bathroom and says, “I also fwushed my socks.”  As the look of terror settled over his face because Greg is coming at him, he also adds, “Nooooooo!  Daddy don’t spank me!”

Luckily Brock’s tiny behind is small enough that his underwear didn’t clog the plumbing because Greg threatened to make him sit outside with him in the freezing rain while he used the plumbing snake to un-clog our sewer system if it did back up.

Greg & I both cringed every time the toilet flushed.  Or when I ran the dishwasher.  Or when I did a load of laundry.  We were just waiting for water to start seeping out of the bathroom.

Luckily for Brock, it never did.

Apparently we are going to have to add “No flushing of clothing down the toilet” to our house rule list.

I’m not the only one that has a child like this, right?  Please.  Share your misery here.  I want to know that I’m not alone!


2 thoughts on “It’s going to be a miracle if this kid survives the next 10 days

  1. Oh, you will have to ask Bill S. about E. flushing his down the toilet, not once but twice and the second time was right after he had to pull the toilet to get the first pair out and reset it. I think I will tell him, the ghost will come out of the toilet and get him if he flushes them here! But it did make me laugh today. I bet he was really sorry!
    Nan and Papa

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