A few nights ago, I was giving the kids a bath. They were playing contentedly and I was watching them lovingly thinking about how sometimes I’m too hard on them and how they can be so angelic at times.
Of course, reality was quick to crash into my daydream by throwing this little gem at me:
Brock: Mom? Does it hurt when a baby comes out of your vagina?
Me: . . .
Brock: Mooooommmm? I asked you a question!
Me: Um, I know but I’m trying to think about how to answer it without scaring you for life.
Brock/Me: long pause
Me: Well, yes. It does hurt when a baby comes out of a mommy’s vagina. But, where did you hear that babies come from vaginas?
Brock: Well. I’m a pretty smart little guy. Do you want to know what I think happened?
Me: (cautiously) Sure?
Brock: Well, I didn’t want to hurt your tummy by cutting you open and coming out that way so God opened up your vagina and I came out that way!
Me: That was nice of you to not want to hurt my tummy!
Brock: Yeah. But I still hurt your vagina. Right, Mom?
I guess the upshot is that he already knows where babies “come from” so we can cross that uncomfortable topic off the list.